Saturday, February 19, 2011

The Most Ghetto Party Store In Grand Rapids Contest 2011

Maybe this isn't the best place for this topic, in a "retro" blog, but maybe it is.
Ghetto-ass party stores have existed since the dawn of time, it's a known fact.

Anyway, there's some stiff competition for the title this year. Some big-name players. Let's take a look at the contenders...

Bere Store, Franklin & Jefferson
Spike n' Mikes, Fulton & Jefferson
Family Pantry, Stocking? Wessiiiide
Lucky's, Division and Weston
Richard's, Burton
Morton Party Store, Monroe
Party World, Alpine
Big Man's? Fulton

I will visit each of these establishments, discretely or indiscreetly take photos and gather reconnaissance.
Not totally sure how to decide the "winner."  I suppose by closely monitoring my own level of revulsion, culture-shock or nervousness for my safety and at the end deciding which visit left the deepest emotional scars?  Truth is, I enjoy ghetto stuff. Maybe the winner is whichever place I feel the most at home?  I don't know, I'm making this shit up as I go.  I seem to end up frequenting shady party stores anyway, why not make a project out of it.
I think it would be more fun if I can figure out how to create an online pole and let people cast votes.
Let The People democratically decide which G.R. party store sucks the worst!
Somebody's going to win though and the prize is being secretly mocked on the internet.

I think the first one I'll visit this week is Family Pantry. Stay tuned......

Family Pantry already earns +5 Ghetto points for broken sign


  1. I think points should most def be added if there is any sort of glass and/or bullet proof barrier separating the cashier from the patrons of the establishment

  2. Maybe a "scoring system" can be devised. Hmmm....

  3. Spike n Mike's is actually at Fulton & Diamond. It gets +10 for the porn selection but -10 for having craft beer, and another -5 for its location in a gentrifying neighborhood.

    What about that place on Division and Hall?

  4. Okay, I know the one on Division and Hall. Maybe I should pick this topic back up. I kind of dropped it because I couldn't decide a "winner." They all seem about equally ghetto to me or at least the differences are very subtle.ite jerk

  5. Hall and Giddings by the Ottawa library is one of my faves, the Miti Mini Superette. Bulletholes, broken glass, rarely any food stocked. Run by the same dudes as Spike & Mike's or at least some of the same dudes work there. Plus like 6 months ago it got robbed by a dude dressed in a clown costume. The other one I am really surprised isn't on this list is Clark's on State and Madison, that place is awesome! It's got that huge back part that is blocked off by 2 liters or something. That place always reminds me of a zombie movie, like it's eerily giant and empty and I feel like I'll turn a corner and there will be a zombie.

  6. i can remember going to totr and getting alcohol at a party store on wealthy st. idont remember the name but they would sell to anyone. i mean anyone. buy a couple 40s of mickeys and slam em in the parking lot. pretty ghetto

    1. I'm gonna venture that you might be talking about Little Jack's Corner!

  7. Clark's on State Street needs to be on this list. You have a large low-income housing project next to a liquor store across from a small park; a trifecta that makes a great ghetto party store!